Fighting like cats and dogs. No. Fighting like humans.

Seriously, some people are totally nuts.

Barking mad, if that doesn't insult dogs.

Check out this from today's Herald Sun:

DOG lover Deborah Parkhouse has spent $87,000 building a pooch palace for her adopted afghan hounds.

But the cat lover next door threatens to destroy this doggie haven.

There's a cat lover and a dog lover living next door to each other. Kind of OK so far, it is in the country.

Cat breeder Alcira Crosby has complained the howling dogs disturb her peace; and the local council has ordered the doghouse be moved.

Now just hold on a minute. The complainer ... is a cat breeder?

That I have a problem with. The country is overrun with feral animals feasting on native wildlife and this woman is ... breeding more.

Let's compare that to what the poor dog woman is doing. What the poor dog woman is doing is picking up the pieces after humans have dispensed with these innocent and beautiful creatures. After they have admired their regal features but got sick of looking after them. After they have turfed them into the RSPCA or the Lost Dogs' Home to be put down, their bedraggled hair uncombed, their pack instincts of running for joy in the field sadly unfulfilled.

Except they won't be put down, because this angel-woman has saved them.

So, we have in one house, someone manufacturing cats for humans and in the next door house someone saving animals from humans. So you know who's in the right already. I mean no argument, right? Any talk of noise or inconvenience is just talk, right?

No. The case is going to the Victorian Civil and Administrative Tribunal.

The cat woman says this: noise from the afghans (and three terriers and a trio of cats) is driving clients away.

'Clients'? How about the 'clients' go to the Greensborough Cat Shelter where they can have all the cats they want, abandoned by humans. But no, we have to have another human manufacturing more cats.

'Clients', presumably going there to buy animals, object to the sound ... of animals. 'Oh excuse me, I heard a dog bark, goodbye.' Yeah sure, that's likely. My god, I hate that word 'clients'.

So let's see what the cat woman and her 'clients' object to.

The "shed", as Mrs Parkhouse describes the doghouse, has thick concrete floors; the walls and ceiling are insulated for temperature and noise.

The flue from the dogs' stove is fixed inside the roof, and a front porch allows them to gaze down on the ornamental lakes in which they swim.

"I am not moving the doghouse," Mrs Parkhouse said yesterday. "It would cost twice as much as it already has to build, and it would be virtually impossible anyway."

Mrs Parkhouse built the shed especially for her pets' comfort on 12 hectares bought in 2001.

"Some people would say it is extravagant, but I wanted something they considered comfortable and, I thought, humane housing for large dogs," she said yesterday.

This is heaven on earth for dogs, but God's creatures deserve it. Abandoned by bad humans, they finally enjoy some of the pleasures many humans will not enjoy. In classical Greek philosphy and literature this is called nemesis.

And cat woman wants all this to end because 'clients' might object to a dog bark. And what is the spineless local council doing when it should be fixing roads and collecting rubbish?

Macedon Ranges Shire has intervened to impose conditions on the annual permit that allows Mrs Parkhouse to keep her nine canine companions.

These cover feeding and exercise times and the location of their house.

When someone complains these days, everyone listens. Even the local council.

But Mrs Parkhouse argues the council has no jurisdiction to order changes to her permit and that the conditions are unreasonable. "The irony is that I have done everything by the book, when I really need never have bothered," she said. Mrs Parkhouse said she had lived alongside her former good friend for two years before their dispute flared this year.

She's done everything right, but some whinging loser complains, so her entire benevolent, altruistic venture is thrown into doubt and chaos. Like, Happy Christmas, neighbour!

Mrs Crosby's complaints have brought her her own council woes – officers are investigating whether her cattery requires a planning permit.

Yeah, well, what goes around comes around. Let's hope it's goodbye, cat manufacturing business.

And goodbye 'clients'.

Good riddance. Hey Towser, here's a nice bone for you and one for all your shaggy friends. Enjoy.